Power Walking

by J.G. Fabiano

The late 1970's brought in the idea that running three to five miles a day was the secret to everlasting health and vitality. The side effects of shin splints, heart attacks, and the destruction of both knees and ankles dampened the enthusiasm toward this type of exercise.

The 1980's gave us Jane Fonda with her aerobic formula for eternal youth. All around our nation, health clubs promoted this new strategy to make us the healthiest people on earth. But there is just so much television that can be watched. Also, after a while, people began to realize that the people doing the exercising taped for fifteen minutes and took two hours off to rest.

The early '90's had technology take over with exercise bikes, computer run tread mills, and machines that were supposed to make everyone look like an Olympic gymnast. Of course, these machines were ugly and were quickly put away into the depths of our attics or garages. The machines simply grew older faster than we did.

The only problem with this approach was that the young men and women of the '60's, 70's, 80's, and '90's, were becoming the middle-aged people of the late 1990's. And so were their shins, hearts, knees, and ankles. Low impact aerobics attempted to take the place of the higher impact variety. But, most of us considered this type of exercise appropriate for people over 60, or extreme wimps.

Well with the arrival of the late 1990's, the newest means of holding on to a youthful appearance became popular. It's called Power Walking. Today's roads and beaches are filled with fully equipped power walkers leaning into the wind in a quest to become proficient in this newest of exercise programs.

Power walkers are usually seen in pairs, with the man in front, head held high, and in perfect stride. He is seen leading the head-bowed, sweating woman straining to keep up with the strides of the leader. Or is it the other way around?

The equipment of today's power walker consists of walking sneakers. The only way I can describe this piece of apparatus is to say that it looks like the sneaker manufacturers took their least expensive product and labeled them for walking only. Of course, they put them in a very expensive looking box. This necessitated raising the price of the product at least four fold. Specialized walking socks are also necessary and cost an arm and a leg for the same reasons. They are still white, of course, but they are for walking only.

Even more important than the sneakers and socks is a piece of technology called the pedometer. This usually is hooked on the pants of the person whose stride is measured to figure how many miles are being walked by the power walkers. The only disadvantage is that after the stride is measured the person wearing the pedometer is forced to walk at exactly the measured stride no matter where or on what he or she is walking. This makes the walker look as though either something is stuck in his or her pants or the walker is suffering through some sort of muscular disorder.

The attire of the power walker consists of a perfectly color coordinated outfit with flared shorts and a loosely fitted blouse or shirt. The color must be luminescent to allow for safe power walking at night. The front of the pants must have a small pocket which holds the pedometer. The back of the shirt usually has a statement displaying such sayings as, "Power Walkers Make Better Lovers", "Eat My Power Dust", or the ever-popular, "Power Walking For America".

The only disadvantage to becoming a power walker is the time required. A true believer of power walking must walk at least three miles in the morning, two miles in the afternoon, and finish the day with at least four miles before the sun goes down.

Anything! Family, friends, or employment that interferes with this schedule must be eliminated. If an emergency does occur, the power walker is depressed the next day because of the failure to complete his or her self assigned task. Some say marriages and businesses have been destroyed because of this type of dedication to cause. Or should I say, obsession.

Yes, it is obvious that power walking has become the health trend of the late 1990's. But since baby boomers will never stop their aging process, it is only a matter of time before we see the emergence of the exercise trend of the new millennium. Power Walker Walking or maybe even Power Crawling.

Comments writers@mcint.com
Last Updated: August 11, 1996