A Glitch of Generations

by J.G. Fabiano

A few weeks ago my daughter, who is almost 21, and I had a discussion concerning fashion. She was complaining that I always looked disheveled around the house because I wore odd colored surfing jams and a not so clean sweat or T-shirt. She just couldn't understand why I did not have more pride in myself. Why I couldn't at least shave every now and then to look partially presentable.

As she was lecturing me I noticed that she was wearing her usual name brand top and shorts which were, of course, perfectly matched. I also observed how her hair was in place and, what little make-up she was wearing, was perfectly displayed.

A memory came to me. One that I can't place but it obviously left an impression. It concerned a television show. Probably a sitcom. The story line concerned a parent looking into his child's future by seeing what his child's children would be like. Because, the sitcom was in the late sixties or early seventies, the parent was conservative in dress and opinion. His child, on the other hand, was liberal and represented the rebellious attitude of those times. The parent imagined his child grown and with a teenage offspring. The new offspring was conservative with the new parent continuing to represent the liberal ideas and dress of his or her youth. At the time, I remember brushing off this concept because I knew that I represented the future which was what everything and everyone had to become.

But, here I sit in my own little sitcom being ridiculed by my daughter whose appearance my parents are very proud of. Yet, I didn't want our discussion to stop with appearance. I wanted to take this opportunity to discuss different ideas in which I took for granted as representing fact. The first question I asked my daughter was about what her ideas were concerning capitol punishment. She told me that it was not only a right but a responsibility of society to kill someone who kills. I closed my eyes and remembered the numerous demonstrations I took part in rallying for the extinction of a law which everyone around me considered barbaric. I see now that this concept is a minority opinion and the one of my daughter is that of the majority. She then added that it was a total waste of money to keep someone in jail. Why should society have to pay for someone who murders.

I continued our conversation by asking what she thought of the concept of war. She told me that if it made our society safer and stronger then it was OK. She described the pride she felt for her country. She used the Gulf War as an example. I then asked her what she thought of the thousands of deaths caused by the war. She answered by stating that they began the war and that they deserved exactly what they got. Memories of anti-war rallies danced through my mind. Demonstrations that stopped a war and was supposed to eliminate any possibility of further foreign adventures. I knew then that my generation failed to teach the next generation lessons learned.

We talked about race riots and welfare. Compassion leaked out because she could not understand why people would riot in their own neighborhoods. I explained that this reality existed because of the hopelessness and despair of the people living there. I told her that these people have very little hope and much too much anger. She brushed off my argument by telling me that those people were using their situation as an excuse. That, in a time of low unemployment, they should get off their butts and get out to work. She reminded me that the welfare program was a dinosaur and that society had no responsibility over peoples well-being. This, of course, coming from a person who is very well off.

My daughter and I discussed many topics that day. Some concerned abortion, education, and social structures. Throughout our conversation I imagined that sitcom. It was simply trying to make the audience laugh at the role reversals, the generation glitch. I wonder if the writers knew that they would become the Nostradamus of my time. If they knew, I don't think they would continue to make their audience laugh.

Jim Fabiano is a teacher and a writer living in York, Maine

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Last Updated: August 31, 1997