"What's goin' down, here, anyway?"
"Take him downtown, Crocker.'
"Downtown! Lissen, man, that just won't go DOWN! We're ALREADY downtown, that's what!
"Then take him uptown. Bring him back downtown."
"No, man, no! How are we gonna get him back downtown?"
"This is San Francisco, right, Kootchy-koo? When you get him uptown, just hunker him down and he'll roll back downtown."
"Say, man, no, that just won't go down!"
"What's going down here, anyway, Theo?"
"Murder one, that's what, Captain!"
"I'll trade you two Moral Turps for one Murder One."
"Hey. Who loves ya, baby? But your asking for something that just won't go down, downtown!"
"Make it four Jaywalks for one Murder One."
"I don't plea bargain, baby! Fatso! Bring us in a cup of coffee!"
"They're tearin' their HAIR out, downtown in the DA's office! They wanna know what's comin' DOWN. They want a COLLAR--fast!"
"Frank. Give me 48 hours."
"48 HOURS! They'll ream my jeans downtown, but OK, you got it. Me, I'm goin' uptown."
"Say, man, no, lissen, uptown's nowhere!"
"Shut up, Belker! Anyway, waddaya talk? All the uptight high class bimbos are uptown."
"Here's your coffee, Lootenint. What's goin' down?"
"Get out! Come in Counselor!"
"Where's Furillo?"
"I'm over here, Counselor, calmly giving orders."
"Furillo, your goons are violating the rights of every street-wise bimbo in this street-wise precinct! When are you going to wise up?"
"For your INFORMATION, Ms. Davenport, I've got a squad room full of herpes from your precious bimbos, three cases of crabs and a partridge in a pear tree! My kid is missing, my ex-wife is crying, and my men are NOT being careful out there! I dunno, Counselor, I just--"
"Tired?"
"You bet."
"Lunch?"
"You bet."
"Fall in the sack?"
"You bet!"
"Freeze-frame on a tender scene at the fade-out?"
"While the credits roll! You got it, Counselor! Kojak, take all my calls!"